Vatican Abdicator Read online

  The Flaze makes another series of whispery, slithering sounds. The translator kicks on after he finishes.

  “We. The Flaze. These. The Domo. We come. SSsssss with you.”

  “Wait,” BC says. “You come to ‘what’ with us?” BC can’t understand the translator. The two Flaze confer. The shorter Flaze speaks, and is translated.

  “We. Negotiate. With you,” the translator says.

  One of the Domo takes this as his cue to speak.

  “You are both a great danger and in great danger,” the Domo says in English, his voice smooth and greasy with the hint of an old British accent. “As this situation is of our creation, we feel the need to once again involve ourselves in human affairs.”

  “Your creation?” BC goads them, curious to their response.

  The Domo and the Flaze look at each other. The Flaze speak, whispery slithering sounds left untranslated this time. The Domo answer, briefly, in a sing-song voice that sounds a bit like a funeral chant. The Domo turn back to BC. The short one speaks again.

  “We have been… helping you humans for some time now,” the Domo explains to him.

  “And helping yourselves to us, too,” Krish says in a low voice. The Domo hear him and appear disturbed. Anita looks Krish down with a withering stare filled with daggers. The Domo, taken aback momentarily, then continue.

  “Yes. Well. As it were,” the Domo says, sounding like a fussy old British man. “We have protected your planet from the Eldred for thousands of your years.”

  The Flaze speaks, all slithering whispers. The translator then does its part: “Domo speak. Half true. Some fact. Domo way. Not protection. Hide you. Guarded you. Watch development. Hope. Gain advantage. Bring you in. Our allies. Break iron grip. Eldred. Failed.”

  The Domo leader speaks again, after shooting a glance at the Flaze.

  “Still. In hiding you, we were protecting you. We allowed your race to grow and develop. Had the Eldred found the human race any earlier, they would have wiped you out in one beat of your heart.”

  The Flaze hisses and whispers, and is translated: “Familiar? Ancient Enemy?”

  BC nods. “The Eldred told me about them. And they showed me what they looked like. They tell me we humans are the ‘Ancient Enemy’ reborn, or at least an offshoot of them.”

  The Flaze hisses and whispers, and says through the translator, “Yesss. The Eldred. Created race. Ancient Enemy. Servant race. Million years ago. Ancient Enemy. Advanced. Brutal. Savage. Eldred Rise. Destroy Ancient Enemy. Scientists. Ancient Enemy. Gee-net-a-cists. Change Eldred. Altered. Overthrow Ancient Enemy. Final Destruction. Other Gee-net-a-cists send seeds out to stars. Bundles. Dee En Ay. Gee-net-ick material. Star seeds. Land. Planets. Restart race. Millions. Before End.”

  The Domo picks up the thread of the story. “We watched as the Eldred tracked down these star seeds throughout the centuries. Wherever one was found, all life on the planet would be destroyed by the Eldred in their attempt to stop the return of the Ancient Enemy. The Eldred had already hit your Earth once. They didn’t think they needed to return.”

  The Flaze hisses and whispers and is translated: “One Star Seed. Eluded. Eldred. We track. Seed lands. Here. Your planet. Earth. Not same. Ice. Seed spill. Dee En Ay. You develop.”

  “We kept you safe, hidden away from the Eldred,” the Domo says. “Otherwise your planet would have suffered the same fate as so many others. So, you see, we feel somewhat responsible for all this.”

  “I see,” BC says.

  Pretty much backs up what the Eldred told me.

  “The Eldred do not see it, but your race is different. From the Ancient Enemy,” the Domo says. The Flaze hisses and whispers. The translator says: “Eldred. May. See it. You. Not destroyed.”

  “How are we different?” BC asks.

  “You…” the Domo starts, then stops. “Your race possesses another ‘dimension’, I guess I’d say. It is hard to translate what I mean.”

  “The Eldred did mention something about our religions,” BC observes.

  “Yes!” the Domo agrees enthusiastically. “That is an example of what we mean. Then the Eldred do see it!”

  The Flaze interrupts with hisses and whispers, translated as: “Dolomay. Turns you. Humans turn. Be. Ancient Enemy.”

  “Or at least he’s trying to. Do you know what’s going on,” the Domo says, “Out there?” he asks, making a sweeping gesture with his arm.

  “I’ve been told Dolomay is now raiding your settlements,” BC responds.

  “This is only half the truth,” The Domo tells him, echoing the Flaze’s earlier words. The Flaze hisses and whispers and the translators speaks again.

  “Dolomay. Stolen Ships. Modified. Improved. Ships land. Crews disembark. Wholesale slaughter. Kill all. Take all. And Worse.”

  “Worse?” BC asks.

  “Did you know you can rape the Eldred?” The Domo asks him.

  “What?”

  “The Ancient Enemy created the Eldred to serve them in every way,” The Domo clarifies.

  “Oh.”

  “Dolomay has led his crew in this activity. It, unfortunately, usually kills the Eldred involved, but seems to provide immense pleasure to the Ancient Enemy. Dolomay and his crew are doing this to every Eldred they find. You See? Dolomay tries to turn humans back into the Ancient Enemy.”

  “Wait,” BC puzzles. “If they kill everyone, how do you know all this?”

  “Some have escaped to speak of the atrocities,” the Domo explains. “But only narrowly. They were left for dead, or otherwise managed to somehow be overlooked.”

  The Flaze hisses and speaks again.

  “Eldred grow insane. Anger,” the Flaze translator says.

  “Tell me about it,” BC says in a low voice.

  The Flaze begins a long hiss and raspy conversation. The translator starts.

  “Will. Tell. Again.”

  “No!” BC says quickly. “I’m sorry. That’s just an expression. You don’t need to…”

  “Eldred. Angered. Violated,” The Flaze continues for a moment. Then the translator stops, and then says, “Understanding.”

  “This is some of what we come to tell you,” The Domo says. “Unpleasant though these details may be.”

  “More,” the Flaze hisses and is translated. “Eldred. Cannot stop. Dolomay.”

  “Among the, uh, civilized races of the galaxy, it is usual for a race to police their own,” the Domo says. “It is, therefore, up to you to stop Dolomay. You must stop Dolomay. Or the Eldred will soon bring their planetary devastator to your system here. To remove the ‘taint’ of Dolomay. They will stop hunting him and turn their attention to your planets, and eliminate any base of support he might have.”

  “Great,” BC sighs. “So you guys want to help us, right?” BC asks.

  The Flaze again hisses and whispers and is translated, “This help. Information. No more.”

  “What?” BC tries not to raise his voice. “This is it?”

  “Our information is valuable to you, is it not?” the Domo asks.

  “Look, I don’t need this information, I need ships!” BC loses it a little. “I need for my scientists to get their hands on Eldred technology – can you help with that? What about your technology? Let my scientists take a look at your tech.”

  The Domo and the Flaze all look away from BC. Anita clears her throat.

  “BC?” she says quietly.

  “Yes, Anita?”

  “The Domo and the Flaze are their tech with us, and we with them. It’s already happening.”

  “Yes!” The Domo leader perks up. “Your Transpace drive is a marvel!”

  The “expression” on the Domo’s “face” makes BC wince involuntarily, although he’s sure the bizarre gnashing of pointy “teeth” is supposed to be the approximation of a smile.

  “Great,” BC says. “Just great.”

  So, we’ve gotten all we’re gonna get from these clowns, then? What is Dolomay getting his hands on, then? Stuff
they’re not willing to share?

  The Flaze leader hisses and makes more slithering sounds. The translator speaks.

  “Eldred. Possess. Possessive. Ancient Enemy. Technology. Use!”

  I’ve gotta get my hands on an Eldred ship!

  “The Eldred do not always appreciate the deadliness of the Ancient technology they employ,”

  The Domo says. “They merely use it.”

  “There is still something you can help us with,” BC tells the aliens.

  “There is?” The Domo questions cautiously as the Flaze hisses.

  “What. Want?” the Flaze translator says.

  “I want you two to join me and address the human media. Or all four of you, even better. Stand behind me and follow my cues. That’s all you’ll have to do. Will you at least consider that?”

  The Domo and Flaze confer among themselves. Then the two of them who have not spoken turn and leave the room. The Flaze and Domo “leaders” remain.

  “We two will join you for this ‘media appearance’,” the Domo tells BC. The Flaze hisses his answer.

  “There. Be,” the translator speaks, “No. Speak. Awkward. Domo. Speak.”

  The Domo nods.

  Well, at least it’s something.

  “Great!” BC says, this time meaning it. “Krish? Dell? Can you set me up a news feed?”

  “Sure,” Krish says. “You mean from here?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’ll take care of it!” Krish says. He leaves to make the arrangements. The Flaze hisses, whispers and is translated. “What. Good? Display.”

  “It’s only a part of my bigger plan,” BC explains. “But in order for me to get those other parts of the plan in motion, I need the rest of the human race to know how real the whole situation is. I need them to see you. Both of you. So they know other races exist out there,” he tries to explain.

  “You see, right now, people think Dolomay is another human, a leader of the Universal Islamic Nation, the UIN, gone rogue. Thanks to my government, the UTZ council, even though the Eldred have attacked human settlements, most humans don’t know they’ve been hit by aliens, only that they’ve been hit. Most humans don’t know what the stakes are in this war, or even that aliens want to take us out,” BC

  says.

  “What of the Eldred’s plague?” the Domo asks.

  “We’ve cured the plague, or at least have a vaccine for it now. Even so, people don’t know it came from the Eldred. There are rumors it came from aliens, but nobody seems to believe it,” BC tells them. “That’s why I want you to be there as we make this announcement. And after we’re through here, the next step is capturing an Eldred ship. And then we can find out what makes it tic.”

  The Flaze and the Domo look at BC in silence.

  How do you read these guys? Is this surprise? Amusement? Anger?

  Krish comes back in and places a grey cube in the center of the table.

  “That’s it,” he tells BC. “Whenever you’re ready. They’re waiting for you. Just speak, it’s cued to your voice.”

  BC nods at Krish.

  Don’t want to speak until I’m ready, then, do I?

  BC motions to the two aliens to join him on his side of the table. They move around the table and take up positions behind him.

  Woah, what’s that smell?

  Damn, the Domo smells like rotting garbage lying in the hot sun! The Flaze? Just kinda musty.

  Well, here goes…

  “Hello. I’m Bernard Campion, chief CEO of the Universal Trade Zone CEO Council… and a few other things I’ll explain in a minute. I’m talking to you today from a base out here in the asteroids, run by the Transpace Project of the UTZ, the company I’m the CEO for.

  “Some of what I’m about to tell you, you may have already heard, in other news reports. But I hope you will listen when I tell you that the human race, the entire human race, stands on the brink of being wiped out by powerful forces from beyond our solar system.

  “Please, hear me out. Behind me stand the representatives of two alien species, the Flaze,” BC

  turns in the Flaze’s direction, “and The Domo,” he says, turning back to indicate the Domo.

  “We are not alone in the universe. Besides the Flaze and the Domo, there is another race we call the Eldred. One of their enemies has seized a UIN ship. This enemy looks human, like us, and he has captured a human crew to serve him and fly his ship. You know him as the former head of the UIN, Ibn Al-Dolomé.

  “His ships have been attacking us, on Earth, in orbit, on the Moon. We recently had a bit of time go by when his ships didn’t attack us. He wasn’t just lying low, I’m afraid. Instead, the ships were out attacking these aliens and others. These ships have continued their destruction among the worlds of the Flaze, the Domo, and the race called the Eldred.

  “These emissaries of the Flaze and the Domo came here to see me today to tell me, to warn us the Eldred are planning to retaliate against us,” BC says. “Against all of us. They don’t see the difference between the UIN and the UTZ. They just see a race collaborating with their enemies.

  “The Eldred have already shown a willingness to take human life. They engineered the plague that nearly wiped us out. Now they are mounting a more physical threat.

  “Our challenge is two-fold. We need to stop the ships of humans led by Dolomay, this enemy of the Eldred. We also need to stop the Eldred from exterminating us in the name of interstellar pest control.

  “The Eldred recently attacked Mars. The reason for this is that the man who calls himself Ibn Al Dolomé, who recently rose to lead the UIN, is not a man at all!” BC pauses to let what he just said sink in.

  “Dolomay is known by the Eldred as the Ancient Enemy. He is an alien, a member of an ancient race that once dominated the galaxy, and dominated the Eldred. He has taken control of the UIN ships and has been marauding through space with human crews under his control. He is causing immense pain and suffering, and his actions now threaten to bring retribution down upon us all.”

  BC clears his throat.

  “For some strange reason or reasons, I’ve come to be at the center of all this. As head of the UTZ Council, I expect to speak for, and work on behalf of, the UTZ. As the former Pope, I enjoy the support of M’Bekke, ah, Pope John Paul the Fourth, and the NcC.

  “I also ask for support from those of you listening on Mars. When Dolomay departed from Mars, Al Salid granted me the leadership of Mars in order to stop the Eldred from continuing their vicious attack. Although I was declared leader of Mars, I do not claim to lead the UIN. Of course, as of right now, there really is no UIN.

  “All of this has led the Eldred, and these other aliens you see here, to regard me as the person to talk to. I’ve been put in a position where I’m speaking for all of us. It’s not a burden I’d choose, but I’ll try to bear it best I can and not fu… mess up.

  “None of you elected me. But I hope you’ll give me your support as we face this two-pronged challenge. I don’t mean to frighten you, but you need to know what the stakes are. We are now effectively at war on an interstellar level. I’ll be honest with you: we are in waaay over our heads, here, folks. But we do have allies,” BC pauses to nod at both the Flaze and the Domo. “And we do have a plan to fight both Dolomay and the Eldred.

  “I can’t tell you what that plan is right now because the Eldred, and maybe even Dolomay, are listening in on what I’m telling you right now. I have to ask you to bear with me. Please. Offer any help you can. As human beings, we’re all in this together. In the eyes of our enemies there is no UTZ, there is no UIN. Only human beings. One race. We really are all in this together. We need to put aside our differences to stand together as the human race.

  “Thank you.”

  Krish moves over and snags the cube from the table top.

  “Done!” he says as he pockets the device.

  BC turns to the Flaze and the Domo.

  “Thank you,” he says to them. “I know this isn’t what you
came for, but I think it helped.”

  The Flaze whispers and hisses and the translator says, “Admire. Spirit. Success. Yours. Hope. Stop. Dolomay.”

  The Flaze turns and leaves the room.

  “That was clever and well done, Campion,” The Domo tells BC. “We, too, hope you are successful.” The alien turns and follows the other one out.

  BC is left standing with Anita, Krish and Dell. He lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

  “I guess that went as well as could be expected,” BC assesses. “What did I just say?”

  “Well, let’s see,” Anita says. She holds up her hand to tick off her points finger by finger. “One: You declared yourself the leader of the human race. Two: You, um, promised to eliminate our enemies and save us all. Pretty much. That’s all.”

  “Yeah, that’s what I thought I heard myself saying. Just seemed like the right thing to do.”

  “So,” Anita asks BC, a puzzled look on her face, “Do you really have a plan?”

  “What do you think?” he asks her back.

  “Don’t know. Thought you might be making this up as you went along.”

  “Did you, now? Oh ye of little faith,” BC admonishes her. “Of course I have a plan. I just made one up.”

  Anita shakes her head.

  “I knew it,” she says. “So… What is your plan?”

  “We need a UIN ship, first. Krish, Dell, I need you two to take a Transpace engine to Mars, find a UIN ship, install the drive and fly it back here.”

  “Can I ask why?” Krish asks BC.

  “You can ask,” BC responds without answering him. He stares at the smaller man. Krish stares back, then gives up and turns to go.

  “Fine,” he says as he’s leaving. He looks over at Dell. “C’mon. Time to do the emperor’s bidding, you know!”

  Dell nods to BC and then turns and follows Krish out the door.

  “So.” Anita confronts BC. “What is your plan?”

  “I want to make a decoy ship. Use it to lure the Eldred into a vulnerable position. Then we use the UIN’s old takeover technology to power down an Eldred ship so we can capture it!”

  “The UIN’s old takeover tech? What, from the early years of the war? The tech that shut down the orbital stations? You think that’ll work on the Eldred?” She asks him.